Bagel Bagel Bagel

from Bigger Than Santa: 12 Christmas Songs in 12 Christmas Days by Fortress of Attitude

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lyrics

I had a little bagel, I made it out of dough.
I put it in the oven, and watched my bagel grow!

O, Bagel bagel bagel, I made you out of dough.
I put you in the oven, and watched my bagel grow!

I had a little bagel, I made it out of turkey.
I served it to my vegan friend and then he went berserky.

O, Bagel bagel bagel, I made you out of turkey.
I served you to my vegan friend and then he went berserky.

I had a little bagel, I made it out of jelly.
Tried to spread some jelly on it but it was too much jelly.

O, Bagel bagel bagel, I made you out of jelly.
Tried to spread some jelly on you but it was too much jelly.

I had a little bagel, I made it out of thoughts.
But thinking of my wasted youth does not go well with lox.

O, Bagel bagel bagel, I made you out of thoughts.
But thinking of my wasted youth does not go well with lox.

I had a little bagel with mozzarella cheese.
Learned that a pizza bagel flares up my Crohn’s disease.

O, Bagel bagel bagel with mozzarella cheese.
Learned that a pizza bagel flares up my Crohn’s disease

I had a little bagel, I gave it to Hamas
And though they loved the bagel, they still demanded an islamic fundamentalist Palestinian state

O, Bagel bagel bagel, I gave it to Hamas
And they loved the bagel, they still demanded an Islamic fundamentalist Palestinian state

I had a little bagel, I put it in a cannon.
Did not want to kill no one, just scare my ex-wife Shannon.

O, Bagel bagel bagel, I put you in a cannon.
Did not want to kill no one, just scare my ex-wife Shannon.

I had a little bagel, and we had some good times.
They all came to an end when I ran out of dumb rhymes.

O, Bagel bagel bagel, we had good times.
They all came to an end when I ran out of dumb rhymes.

credits

from Bigger Than Santa: 12 Christmas Songs in 12 Christmas Days, track released December 22, 2012

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Fortress of Attitude New York, New York

Comedy rock from NYC.

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